It has been a while since my last post. So much has happened. We took a week off on our study since there was a fifth week in January, we resumed last week, except both my daughters were very sick and just starting to recover today. Needless, to say I fell behind on life. I did get my reading done, but didn’t feel like I was able to really hear God talking to me in this chapter. Money management has been a challenge I have worked on since last year. I’ve grown leaps and bounds, so I sort of blew this chapter off.
I feel led to shed light on how God has worked in me tonight, because He truly is amazing and marvelous. Since my girls are sick I ended up missing the bible study on the chapter on loyalty AND money management. I was somewhat relieved since I didn’t feel God speaking to me on the subject, so I took the time to do my bible reading and reviewing this mundane chapter.
Coincidentally (or is it really?), 10 days ago we found out our finances are in jeopardy and we may need to move. Not a time to be thinking about how to manage money . . . . how to save it, maybe! I’ve been fretting about our new financial state and desperately praying and looking for answers to the point of sickness. I was overwhelmed with feelings of helplessness, hopelessness, and disappointment that left me feeling frustrated, stressed, desperate, and in a complete lack of self-control. See, I’ve learned to pray over my finances and all decisions that involve money, because it is an area of weakness for me. To be found in the position that we are in today I had no other thought than to ask, why? I’ve worked so hard on money management this past year; I’ve prayed over most financial decisions and have sought Your wisdom; I know I am far from perfection, but I can see how You have grown me in areas I never thought possible; I know your hand has been here all along. Why this? Maybe you can relate?
Yesterday I decided no more! I will pray, be still, and wait. God made way for this opportunity tonight so I can hear Him speak! In my reading I came across a verse that I recognized as a loud cry from my heart.
“Show me your ways, O Lord: Teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; on You I wait all the day.” Psalm 25:4-5.
What a sense of relief. This verse is so applicable for me right now and for all of us that are struggling to keep ourselves together financially and otherwise. God has reminded me of all the things He has provided for us this past year as we needed them from the most obscure of places. I realized how ideal it is for circumstances to be unfavorable so He can do what He does best-make something out of nothing so we can give Him the glory and share our testimony. I don’t know what that will look like but I’m resting on my assurance of His faithfulness and waiting . . .
I sit here tonight wondering, was it just coincidence that our financial stability has been pulled out from underneath us, that my girls got sick and resulted in my missing the bible study, that I cry out to be lead and taught in His ways only to find comfort in the fact that HE is the God of salvation and that I can confidently wait on His faithfulness? I don’t think so! I believe it was providence and that every minute of our day matters to Him, because now I can praise Him and give Him the glory.
What was my next step? I picked up Beautiful in God’s Eyes and reread that mundane on money management. I found some great tips that I wasn’t able to see before and will be putting them into place real soon. God is faithful. God is amazing. God is in control!